India's future horrible PMs  

Posted by Praveen in , ,

Lately, People of India haven't been very lucky when it comes to its Prime ministers. A seat which was once adorned by the likes of Lal Bahadur Shastri has recently become a magnet for some spineless, sleepy and even brainless souls. The exotic line of not so good PMs started with Morarji Desai, whose mansion reportedly didn't have a urinal. Obviously, such a facility doesn't serve a purpose other than space wastage in a house where the official drink is produced by humans themselves. Then there was the infamous V.P.Singh who rivals our current HRD minister Arjun Singh in implementing stupid rules. Next in line is the one and only Devegowda who was never seen in public with his eyes open. He's famous for sleeping in a vareity of poses in every public meeting that he attended. Then comes a certain puppet who always obeyed the 'mistress of puppets'. So, who's the next in line to join this illustrious company? And what will happen when they take charge...Here are 3 probables and 3 improbables..

1.Rahul 'empty head' Gandhi
A name which is on every lip(each of those lips were paid Rs.1000 each) these days. His educational qualification is still under a question mark. He had successfully sued and made quiet an allegation by a reputed magazine that his harvard degrees are fake. And, now he has surrounded himself with some real Harvard MBA graduates to give him sound advise. Still sometimes his loose tongue brings him bad name on occasions like when he claimed India's independence as his family's achievement. The day he becomes PM, India's fake degree holders will replace the real degree holders in all jobs. All public department heads will be given an opportunity to fill the new job vacancies with unworthy candidates from their own family.

2.Maya 'statue' wati
I can't help but shudder at this thought of her becoming PM. Famous for her opulent birthday
celebrations, the amount spent for which runs to 100s of crores, she has also managed bridge the caste divide in gaining support. Recently, she started a mega project to fill the state with statues of leaders like Ambedkar and herself. When she becomes PM, January 15(her birthday) will be declared a national holiday. Birthday bash collection slips for a minimum amount of 1 lakh will be sent to every Indian citizen's house, failing to pay which you will be brought to justice by a high speed court(read-her goons). Every city centre will be adorned with a statue of the lady and a blue flag.

3.Na'no'rendra Modi
Pre-Nano, he was a demon for the media. Post-Nano, he's a saviour for the media. We have the India Inc singing praises of this man whose long list of achievements boasts of one of India's worst riots. The surge in the developmental side in Gujarat is being praised all over but many are turning a blind eye to the selective development happening there. There are certain places where development is stunted purposefully. Hitler must be turning in his grave and wishing that there was a 1944 model Nano. I better stay away from the task of writing about India's state under the Nano boy.

4.Sanjay 'Jhappi' Dutt
This is not a 'Vaastav' situation, just some imagination. His story is a perfect case of how films can blind common man and create a hero out of a villain. With just the Munnabhai series, he managed to wipe off the stain of arms that he possessed. The 'Jaadu ki jhappi' was accepted happily by atleast a section of the public. After marrying Manyata, he was also affected by the loose tongue disorder. But I still wonder why the 'Jaadu ki jhappi to Mayawati' dialogue evoked such harsh responses. Anyway, I purposefully kept him away from Mayawati to avoid a 'jhappi incident' in my blog. When he becomes PM, a new law will be enacted so that common man can keep 'harmless' weapons like AK-47 and AK-56 in their homes. Munnahai will be screened in Doordarshan as part of national integration every week. Khal Nayak will be screened every alternate week for national disintegration.

5.Lalit 'IPL' Modi
The IPL man is riding high on the 'commercial' success. Obviously, he will have 'power' dreams in the near future. The day he becomes PM, he will come up with a rule to conduct the Indian general elections to be shifted to south Africa, whenever it clashes with the IPL schedule. Postal ballot facility will be provided for those who can't travel till South Africa. Cheerleaders will accompany those who are travelling to South Africa.

6.Rakhi 'dumbo' sawant
This is the depths of far fetched imagination. She's currently in the news for a reality show in NDTV imagine which will conduct a nationwide search for a perrect husband for her. The day she becomes PM, all newspapers will be asked to keep the 'page 3' news in front page with banner headlines like 'Rakhi again slaps husband'. The IIT entrance examinations will be done away with and will be replaced by a Dumbness Quotient(DQ) test.

your crusader Praveen

This entry was posted on Wednesday, April 22, 2009 at Wednesday, April 22, 2009 and is filed under , , . You can follow any responses to this entry through the comments feed .

19 comments

jappi dutt was rofl stuff

dumbo sawant takes the cherry along with cake bro...

6:19 AM

Sarcasm and seriousness mixed well man! :)

Our country is going to the dogs..to be precise, to stray rabid dogs. Mayavati, as you said, gives a shudder to me, everytime I think of her in the top seat. btw where is Jayalalitha in that list??

Are you too scared to write about her Praveen?? Yes I understand, you still remember Karunanidhi dragged out his his house in his undies at midnight, dont you? ;)))

Given the circumstances, M.Singh or Advani will reach the throne this time. But imagine this, Behenji Mayavati is just 53, she still has a good 47+ years more to fight for PM post. (I'm telling this after seeing our Karunakarji fighting for top level posts with both legs in kuzhi..) So I think we will live to see the day we have to address her as PM Mayavati...

ente daivame...

1:53 PM

I don't agree with u on wat u said abt rahul...

but well abt the others I do :)

2:13 PM

Brilliantly written! I'm wondering what the outcome of this elections will be....... it will be a very sad state to see another flip flop government, if it does happen that is!

2:15 PM

LMAO! Too good, man! God save the country!

Peace.

5:01 PM

@chriz
danks bro :D

@scorpiogenius
hahahaa...really am scared by Jaya's jumbo size and her violent past :P
kuzhiyil kaalu neeti irikkunnavar aanallo indiayude FUTURE:D

@PJ
I still don't understand y so many people are so impressed by him...What does he have other than a family name?

@Rakesh
flip flop is the thing having highest probability right now

@kartz
even God wud be scared!

10:49 PM

ha ha elections in SA!!! and cheer leaders to boot...:D

3:45 AM

Oh God..... devils r given oppurtunity 2 save the country :p
Jokes apart, its the real bt pathetic situation that india is facing.We consider to b pretty intellegent among the world, bt whn ut comes to selecting leaders, we r failures.These dayz its like leaders r selecting the ppl, instead of ppl selecting leaders...

10:03 AM

its coz he seems different from the other politicians..that's all...

name..I'd say if he was..juss rahul..also I'd be for him..coz name is not what makes a person..

and i am not for it(name).

1:45 PM

LOLLLLLLLLL ..Superb as always, Praveen
U r back with a bang..
I love ur take on political issues and other things in general

LOL@ all middle names..very creative and hard hitting

PS: U forgot Raj and Varun? :P
very very deserving hehehe

7:27 PM

roflmao!! nice post man !!

2:53 AM

You forgot Achu maama and our dear old Karunakaran !!!

11:00 PM

maya 'statue' wati once said that if we ccan celebrate b'days of nehru, gandhi then why can't hers....so no wonder she will declare her b'day as central holiday (i actually fear that what we now see as sarcasm may turn into reality)...

2:06 AM

good one.. but i dont think Rahul is as bad as the others. i dont know abt the degrees, but he seems nice and genuinely concerned abt common people.

1:35 PM
Joby  

are you sure you wanna include Rahul Gandhi in this list? I can understand Mayawati in there, but Rahul is of a different league altogether and he is a future leader and more so he is presentable as an Indian!

I hope you are not looking forward to some pest like Pinarayi?

For more on the so-called Fake Degree allegation ...

http://ibnlive.in.com/news/cambridge-confirms-rahuls-mphil-degree-in-1995/91337-37.html

1:14 PM

hahaha...what modified names :) but true! oh god,pls save our country!

1:31 PM

@akshaya
wud be exciting enuf thr :P

@devil incarnate
somewat true..tht idea of leaders selecting ppl

@PJ
exactly my point..name's not enough..and sadly in his case, Rahul seems to have nothing else..

@swats
thanks:D
I kept the number limited to 6..else I'll fill up the entire blog

@agent vv
thanks :D

@vimmu
will consider in a future post :P

@smit
god..I never knew about such a comment...shocking!

@amit bose
nice and genuinely concerned...I wud say media hype..

@Joby
Read that report..an M.phil in 9 months? hehehe...Now, Rahul must be having a super brain..

@Archana
:D yea...Let God save

11:18 PM

tat was so funny dude...superb sarcasm and comedy...keep it up!

2:22 PM

While I am no fan of Mayawati, I am shocked to see people approving Rahul gandhi because he looks more presentable. Being civil is important but looks shouldnt really count towards the eligibility to lead the country. Good looking men like Rajiv and Nehru have pathetic records.
As of now we donot have a choice to elect any good leader. I dread if Mayawati or Jayalaitha end up as the next PM of India. They are megalomaniacs who can ruin the country for a small flimsy wish of theirs. They will be happy to see hundreds lose their life and livelihood for their petty wishes to be fulfilled. God save India and Indians from such people.

4:17 PM

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