Wednesday, May 28, 2008

IPL-Cheerleaders,Slaps,Kisses...& Cricket
IPL has caught the imagination of the whole cricketing world and has turned out to be a bigger success than that was predicted. The controversies has added to the popularity of the tournament. Am sure no one will ever forget the great crying scene starring 'tough guy' Sreesanth. This single scene is said to have melted the hearts of women across India and they are now watching IPL regularly instead of their staple diet of 'Saas-Bahu' serials. According to an unofficial survey conducted by this blogger, they are expecting more tear-filled episodes in the IPL thamasha. Teenage guys who were moving away to more fashionable sports like formula 1,NBA and EPL have suddenly started loving cricket. No prizes for guessing the reason. Cheerleaders, ofcourse. The teens find it economic and safer to watch them when compared to renting an adult film cd and secretly watching them. Now they can watch all these safely in front of their parents under the pretext of watching 'cricket'. Even middle aged and expiry aged old men are watching this sport for the first time for this reason alone. And then there are the politicians. Their new hobby is dressing up the cheerleaders. My request to them is-"Please leave alone the poor girls and let them do their job. There are millions of people who don't have money to buy clothes in India. Why don't you think of some policies and aid programs to give them adequate food and shelter rather than investigating on which part of which cheerleader was exposed in the latest match of IPL".

The local chaiwala as well as the high end pubs are also enjoying the fruits of IPL as people crowd around TV shops and big screens every night to watch the matches. The cricketers are all happy except men like Charu sharma and teams like Bangalore. There've been unworthy men like Ponting who played and got paid and are now back home blaming the IPL. He's now asking his countrymen to switch off from IPL and stop paying attention to some retired australian cricketers sweating it out in India. Then, why did he keep quiet while he was busy playing in India? The film stars are also enjoying their night out at the various grounds around India. Shahrukh is seen dancing and screaming for his knight riders but sadly that dance won't last long as they will exit without seeing the semis. The lucky guys are the ones from Kings XI Punjab. Whenever they win a match, they get free hugs and kisses from their pretty owner Preity. Its no wonder then that the guys are competing with each other to win the honours. The list of top wicket takers in IPL is dominated by guys from Kings XI. Wondering how many kisses each of them got.

The star or better to say, the wannabe star of the whole show is undoubtedly the IPL boss Lalit Modi. He's a publicity hungry man who never lets go a photo op. My favourite scene was during the press meet after the Sreesanth-slap, Farooq Engineer made Bhajji and Sree shake hands and make up. The three of them were holding hands together and smiling when a third hand appeared from behind holding them. Then a head popped out and it was our glam boy Lalit. He also has this dirty habit of sitting with and cheering the team that is playing well at the moment. During one cliffhanger match, he had to switch ends atleast 5 times. Anyway, at the end of the match, he would be sitting with the winning team. Meanwhile, Mr.cool 'forever young' Vijay Mallya is having a bad time, with his team discovering news ways of losing with every passing match. His outbursts against Dravid and his team of attacking 'test' players hasn't added anything to his public image, rather it has taken some beating. But there was no shortage in the number of hot damsels accompanying him to watch the matches.

Coming to the cricket part of IPL, despite some so called purists calling it a 'rape of cricket', the matches were well fought in the right spirit and is one great dazzling advertisement for the game of cricket. It tests the skiils of the players to the maximum and puts their quick thinking ability to a hard grind. The old players who were predicted to perish in the tornado of slam bang hitting has infact shone even better than the young guns. Players like Sanath Jayasurya, Shane Warne, McGrath and Sachin Tendulkar are as athletic and spirited as any 20 year old. Their presence has infact turned out to be a blessing for the young ones who get the right guidance from these giants. The greatest gain of the IPL has been the bringing of some unheard of cricketing talents to the limelight. Players like Shikhar Dhawan, Gony, Saha, Abhishek Nayar and many others who were unheard of just 2 months back are now household names. Really, the future of Indian cricket is in safe hands. And there is a big talent pool in place now.

Having been there at the Chinnaswamy Stadium to watch the grand opening of this great sporting fest, am happy to see its astounding success. All in all we can say that the IPL party is here to stay. And 20-20 is the future of the game.

PS-The team is support is Mumbai, just for the simple reason of it being Sachin's team. Even after it lost 4 matches and friends made fun of me for supporting them, I continued my support. And now see what they've done. 6 straight wins and almost won the 7th, if not for some crazy run outs and some umpiring errors. Hope they'll win the championship.

your crusader Praveen

Wednesday, May 07, 2008

Cooking an art movie

Yesterday, saw a post in infyblogs about the ingredients of a horror movie. That inspired me to think on what are the main rules that make up an art movie[or better known under the pet name of award movies].

Rule No.1-The editor is always on bench during the production of the movie. He's only there for the sake of an editor's name in the credit roll. For example, in a movie that I saw recently, there was a crippled child walking along a long road. The scene went on for almost 4 minutes with the whole walking distance being shown on screen.

Some art movie editors are known to do part time job as barbers because they hate a day without cutting.

Rule No.2-Rate of dialogue delivery is one word per minute. In case of a full sentence, you may have to wait for anything from 5 to 30 minutes.

Rule No.3-Words are best left unsaid. For conveying important matters, words are never used. A meaningful glance is enough. Sometimes this can be in varied forms like utterances of "mmmmmmm","aaahaaaa", "aarggghhh", "huhhhh", "aaah","ooooh","ohooo" etc.

Rule No.4-This is a kind of corollary for rule no.3. Speak lots of sentences about obvious and mundane things.
For example-Take the following dialogue between artan and arty


Artan(coming towards arty who is brushing her teeth.Reaches near her after a 5 minute walk)-"I think you are brushing your teeth."[As if a toothbrush inside your mouth is meant for something else]

Arty(slowly raising her face which takes another 2 minutes)-"Yes, I have the habit of brushing my teeth every morning."[Only she has that habit]


Rule No.5-Background music is mostly slow and depressing. The pivotal scenes are usually silent.

Rule No.6-Cameraman is the man getting to sleep the most on the sets. He needs to move the camera only once or twice during the whole shoot.

Rule No.7-The theme of the movie mostly deals with the lower strata of the soceity. There will be lots of scenes of sufferings of one way or the other.

Rule No.8-The actors are the most patient people you can find anywhere in the world[Next to the viewers i.e.]. They should be able to sit for long hours without a single movement, leave alone doing anything. Those who have done tableau in school can shine a lot in this field.

Rule No.9-Forces of nature like wind,rain,sunshine and creatures like dog,cat,crow,eagle get almost the same screen space[sometimes even more] as the lead actors.

Rule No.10-There is no beginning and there is no ending. The movie will be just like saying "and life goes on".


Inspite of all this, I've seen some really touching art house movies that will always be in my list of all time favourite movies.

your crusader Praveen
Never postpone this(only this!)
Many of us has this habit of dreaming of a better tomorrow all the time that we forget the fact that the present time is part of 'the better tomorrow' that we dreamt some days or years back. I guess that must've confused you all. Good, a little confusion is a nice way to wake you up on a lazy morning. Well, what I meant was that we always postpone enjoying life thinking that we'll do so after achieving some goals. For eg, in school we think that we'll enjoy after we pass 10th. After 10th, its time for preparation for entrance exams and all that stuff. So enjoyment is postponed to post-entrance. Then Its life in college and we are all thinking of campus recruitment. Life will be rocking once we pass out of college and start working. And, when we start to work, we realise that enjoyment is possible only after retirement. But who knows what awaits us after retirement.

But, am happy that 'enjoying every moment of life' is the only one thing I never ever postponed. And looking back as well as looking ahead, I feel really good about that...

your crusader Praveen

Tuesday, May 06, 2008

No Man's Land

Saw the Bosnian movie "No Man's land" yesterday. If U haven't heard about it, its the movie that pipped Lagaan to win the Oscar for the best foreign lanuage film in 2001. Its a film about the war between Bosnia and Serbia. Thought its a war movie, don't expect epic war scenes except for some odd shoot outs. What sets it apart is the lighter vein in which big issues are commented upon. It captures the travails of 3 men from either side caught in no man's land. One of them is lying injured on a mine, which will explode if he moves. A UN team is sent to rescue them. This movie actually makes fun of the ineffective UN, which has failed to live up to its name in times of crisis. The media which is hungry for breaking news is also made fun of. The exchanges between the 2 enemy soldiers are hilarious. The scene in which the Bosnian point a gun at the Serbian to make him say that his country started the war. And then after sometime, its the turn of the the Serbian to make the Bosnian say the same.

The movie has some great quotes.
Here are some samples(courtesy-IMDB)

1."A bomb disposal expert only makes one mistake in his life."
"Two."
"Two?"
"The first one is choosing the fucking job!"

2.Neutrality does not exist in the face of murder. Doing nothing to stop it is, in fact, choosing. It is not being neutral.

3.The guy from UN talking to a serbian soldier.

Sgt. Marchand: Vous parlez francais?
Serb private: No.
Sgt. Marchand: Do you speak English?
Serb private: Yes.
Sgt. Marchand: We came for people.
Serb private: Yes.
Sgt. Marchand: People between lines.
Serb private: Yes, yes.
Sgt. Marchand: Where are they?
Serb private: Yes, yes, yes.
Sgt. Marchand: Ok, you don't understand a word of what I'm saying, right?
Serb private: Yes.



Also lookout for some breathtaking scenery of Slovenia, where this movie was filmed.

Still, I think Lagaan deserved an Oscar more than this film.

your crusader Praveen
MAD ADs
Its election time here in Karnataka and the campaigning is going on at a feverish pitch. There are vehicles laden with big cutouts of the candidates looking at us with a big fat conceitful smile. And newspapers are also filled with political ADs of one party or the other. Yesterday, there was this AD in Times Of India by the Congress party carrying the pictures of the usual suspects, the Italian glam girl, her brainless son and the puppet with the beard. But what caught my eye were the pictures of the Kandahar plane hijacking episode and the then external affairs minister Jaswant Singh accompanying the Taliban terrorist who was freed in return for the freedom of the passangers. This was accopanied with a question in bold letters-"Which is the party whose external affairs minister accompanied a terrorist to safety?" and below that there's the answer in even bolder letters-BJP. Then they go on to explain how the BJP and its allies were always soft against terrorism and considering the safety of the nation its better to vote for congress. This is dirty campaigning to say the least. Kandahar is one of the saddest episodes in the history of the nation and putting ADs like this will dig up the trauma that the surviving passengers went through.

PS-Am not a supporter of BJP, or any other party for that matter. Its just that I found this AD was in real bad taste
Your crusader Praveen

Monday, May 05, 2008

Food for thought
Its been a long time since I spend a weekend fully at home. This week also I din't expect to be at home. But somehow, it happened. Two days fully at home, except for the odd trip to the nearby store to buy some items for our cooking extravaganza. Coming to cooking, it was real fun and a source of great satisfaction to eat food cooked by my own hand. For the past 22 years, I been eating food, never giving a thought to the work that goes behind it to make it . But now as I cut the vegetables or hide from the smoke of a boiling excercise gone bad, I suddenly realise how blind I really was to the hard working hands that made tasty food to sustain me for 22 years. I would've laughed at you if you were to tell me about two months back that I'll cook and eat my own food. But somehow it started and me and my friends are really enjoying it. The tears that come when I cut onions are partly due to the mischievious onion itself and partly due to the tears of gratitude to my mother for bearing with all my tantrums that I threw up wanting some specific item to be cooked. Hope I can cook a tasty meal someday for her.

your crusader Praveen